The Other I

May 10, 2022

My next big step in my Old-Old Age

Filed under: Just Stuff — theotheri @ 12:34 am

In January I thought I was fit and energetic enough to write a post here on average every week. That was before the truly unexpected. On January 20th, I – and my surgeon – thought I was going in for a routine hip surgery which would not require me to stay over night in the hospital.

Instead I developed a life-theatening allergic response to the anesthetic and spent an hour hovering with my systolic blood pressure wavering between 20 and 40 degrees, while the surgical team did everything they could to keep me from crossing the eternal river. Fortunately, I lived, but spent 3 days in the intensive ward while I struggled with dementia, nausea, and a mammoth loss of energy.

I am now beginning to feel normal and have made what is for me a completely surprising decision. I am moving into an apartment in a complex built for independent seniors. It’s called “Fox Run by Erickson Senior Living” in Novi, Michgan. It’s on 100 fenced-in acres, with miles of both indoor and outdoor walks, a heated indoor pool, restaurants, a library, physio equipment, and best of all, over a thousand residents who are amazingly welcoming and active.

When I first came back to the US after living in the UK with my English husband for 35 years I thought I would buy an apartment in a condo near some old friends, probably in Brooklyn or the Upper West Side of New York City. It’s another post for another day about why it didn’t work out. But I realized that, although I’m relatively independent, I have deep social needs and spending even a single entire day alone was excruciating, and telephone conversations, emails, or zoom calls simply did not fill the gap.

And besides I couldn’t impose my needs of old-old age on my younger relatives or friends, however willing they were to welcome me into their homes.

So in three days time, I am moving into the apartment I’ve paid for and will live there full time. I expect to live there for the rest of my life since the complex includes a nursing home, loss of memory, and the full range of medical services. It’s a brand new stage in my life.


  1. Congratulations, Terry. What you’ve been through!


    Comment by Thomas J. Hubschman — May 10, 2022 @ 2:57 am | Reply

  2. Terry, So many monumental challenges! May every day bring you love, peace and joy! We’re all on the same journey, walking each other home. Every blessing to each dear one, Love Beth

    Get Outlook for iOS ________________________________


    Comment by E Bastasch — May 10, 2022 @ 3:26 pm | Reply

  3. Hi Terry,
    So glad you made it through your medical ordeal. Congratulations on your new home, that sounds pretty wonderful! All the best, Kath


    Comment by Kathleen — May 10, 2022 @ 5:12 pm | Reply

  4. Sounds like a good choice

    Best wishes


    Comment by rayvoith — May 11, 2022 @ 1:37 pm | Reply

  5. dear Terry, I posted this morning, but it did not come through…..Please know I am with you in loving friendship. A good move to a community with life-long care. Perhaps will bring back some memories of our Maryknoll community days! I did not know you almost died during surgery. Am soooo glad you are still on this planet. We need your wise words, sense of humor, compassionate heart. sending much love across the miles, Carolyn aka Cookie in California


    Comment by Carolym Grassi — May 16, 2022 @ 11:15 pm | Reply

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