The immensely good news is that I have just received an email from my UK accountant. I do not, after all, owe thousands of dollars in back taxes here in England. In fact, I don’t owe anything. So this brings to a conclusion six months of an intensely anxious learning experience during which I processed five years’ worth of numbers, most of them more than once because I’d calculated them using the wrong method the first two or three times round.
I had a large gin and tonic tonight in celebration. I will never, I suppose, know for sure how much of the angst and confusion during this whole process was my own making and how much of it was due to the fact that I think my file was moved in the accountancy office to the desk of a newcomer who was only several steps ahead of me, and not clear in giving directions. In my less hysterical moments I did rather enjoy my exchanges with her, and hope that it has not been a totally frustrating experience for her either.
I did have further confirmation today that there are real cultural differences in the way the English typically approach taxes compared to the way I as an American approach them. I was reviewing the 36 pages of directions from the tax office dedicated solely to calculating how much taxes one owes after one has gathered together the totals of moneys one has earned or received in the last 12 months. The box that caught my eye said: “If you have an entry in box c5.5 and an entry in box 6.2c on the Foreign Pages, this calculation may charge too much tax. Please ask us or your tax adviser to do the calculation for you.” There is no indication of how the alternative calculation might be carried out, no suggestion that the taxpayer him or herself might be capable of actually carrying it out. Again, just a patronizing direction: Give us the numbers and we will do it for you.
Despite a traumatic six months, I admit that I still find the differences between our two cultures quite fascinating. On the other hand, I am looking forward to a prosaic month or two in which the unexpected is kept firmly at bay.
